If you watched the Mayweather/Ortiz fight this past weekend, you surely have an opinion about how it ended.  While many defend Mayweather saying his blow was not at all illegal and many fault Ortiz because one of the first things you learn as a boxer is “Defend Yourself at All Times” there are some of us who still think Mayweather’s shots were cheap.

Just as the fight ended there were a ton of facebook status updates about the subject.  Here’s what I posted…

The head butt may have been dirty but true champions don’t have to match dirt for dirt.

After all the talk of the fight and people bringing up that Ortiz’s headbutt was illegal and Mayweather’s knock out punches weren’t, something else came to my mind.  I posted that too.

I have a few thoughts on that type of mentality (it’s “okay” or there’s “nothing wrong with it” so long as it’s “legal”).  First of all, “right” and “wrong” are not always defined by rules or laws.  For example, just because you “can” cleat defenders when you slide into them doesn’t mean you should always intentionally do so.  Along those lines, here is another facebook post I made the night of the fight that came as a result of comments people made on the Mayweather/Ortiz fight…

When true athletes go into competition their goal is not just to be better than that opponent on that given day but to be the best THEY can be every single day.

Whether it’s training or competition, big stakes or no stakes, millions watching or with no one watching, under ideal circumstances or under adversity, there is no difference. True athletes strive for excellence in all they do.

What do you think? Do you agree or disagree? Leave a comment below and share your thoughts!

One thing you cannot control is how your negative vibe impacts others.  It can be one look, one word, or one action that we put out and can never get back.

While you may be able to drop it, move on and play your game, you have NO control over how others are affected by it.

One distraction from you may be enough to knock someone else’s performance just a bit off kilter and bring down their overall performance.  If you have that affect on most of the teammates who were around you when you put that vibe out, impact is exponential!

On game day especially, do your best to make sure your actions, words, decisions, etc are HELPING your team performance their best!

Athletes like to be in a particular mindset or “groove” as they go into competition.  Disrupting that “mojo” of any of your teammates before a game or during a game is not a good idea.

If you’ve ever run track or run for competition, you know how critical breaking stride or losing your form for just a split second can be.  I know because it happened to me before.  I was just ahead of another sprinter and for just a moment, I lost my form.  I did get it back, but in just that moment, she went from just behind me to just in front of me.

After I regained my stride and form, I did close some of the gap, but not enough to pass her by again.  That’s how I see disruption from inside the team environment/mojo before a game.  It might be a “small” thing that just throws the team off balance just a little, but it can be enough to alter the outcome.

So the challenge for game day is to make sure your impact on teammates and on the team is positive and improves performance!

photo credit: softball team

A player that lifts her teammates to a higher level and helps them quickly recover from mistakes is more valuable than a player who has a stronger arm or bat but doesn’t know how to be a source from which her teammates gain confidence, positivity, and power from.

That post received 53 “likes” within days. That’s the highest yet!

Have you had the opportunity to be on a team with a player like this? Or maybe just observe one on another team?

Players with decent softball skill and this exceptional softball attitude are so much more valuable to a team than a player that has superior softball skills but no further reach.

What do I mean by reach? Dr. Tom Hanson once wrote an article that I wish I could find right now. He was talking about Derek Jeter and about how, when you’re in the room with him, you can just feel his confidence.

His confidence just flows out of him into his surroundings, and therefore, to the people around him as well.

Some players have this effect. Their enthusiasm, confidence, and positive attitude spills over into anything near them.

Other players, while highly talented, do not have this effect.

It’s like everything is bottled up inside them. They perform great, but no none of their teammates can feed off them or “get their juice.”  There’s nothing flowing out of them into their surroundings to feed off of.

While these players may perform at a high level, they do not elevate the game of those around them.

Real MVPs however…

• effectively uplift their teammates
• elevate the game of those around them
• are a source of confidence, strength, resilience, and positivity that others can draw from
• make the game easier and more enjoyable to play
• draw so much enjoyment from simply playing the game their positive “can-do” attitude becomes infectious

Some people refer to this as the “it” factor.  For MVP’s, whatever “it” is…

IT’s in their words and how they say it
IT’s in their every action and every move
IT’s not only when things are going well, but ALL the time
IT’s simply part of who they are

When they infect the rest of the team with their confidence and belief in the team, their team is practically unstoppable!

Seriously, when a team is unified under a common blanket of confidence – watch out!

A player that can bring that to the table every game, to me, brings so much more value than one that can hit a homerun in every game.

What do you think?

Since this topic of “Enough” seems to keep popping up, I decided to post something about it on the AAF Facebook Page.

People seems to like it well enough and some have asked if they can share it with others.  Of course, I have no problem with that, so long as you remember to mention where you got it from.

So feel free to share this Softball Quote of the Week with your team this week…

Whether you win or lose, you really won’t be much different, as a person, than you were 2 hours ago.

Never allow the scoreboard to dictate your self worth!

It’s a highly unreliable and completely irrelevant indicator of your true value as a human being.

Really, a couple of hours doesn’t completely change your life. Maybe you’ll learn a few lessons. Maybe it does give you a different perspective on things.

What you choose to do with your experience may very well change your life.

The win or the loss in and of itself does not do that.  You do. The win or the loss does not suddenly make you amazing if you weren’t before nor does it make you worth less than you were before.

Never tie your self worth to the outcome of your performance or of a game. Your true friends and your loved ones don’t love you any more or less because you did or did not hit a ball, because you did or did not make an error, or because you did or did not win a game.

Who you are as a person, as a human being, is not at all correlated with outcomes on the field.

That is a good idea of course and a natural inclination to have. The problem is that this is the very age when people start moving in different directions for a number if different reasons. Some are personal, some are logistical, some are actually softball related, and others just happen.

Many coaches and parents spend too much time getting upset over this inevitable change. They start getting all bent out of shape over the thought of bringing new girls into the mix…especially when “last year’s” team was successful.

I was recently asked for my thoughts on this very type of situation. Parents were getting concerned because 10 our of 12 girls from a successful 12U team moved up to 14U and now the coaches were looking at bringing in more girls.

Well, first of all 10 players on a 14U travel team isn’t going to be enough so the coaches DO have to bring more players into the team. How many? Tough to say! It’s easy to go with a smaller roster when there is a history if the players being committed and capable of showing up week after week. But if you’re bringing new players and families into the mix, you may be unsure of which ones will really truly be reliable.

It’s great to be able to have a roster of 12. However, if you happen to have an injury and an illness at the same time on a long tournament weekend, it leaves you in a challenging spot. A spot that not only makes things tougher for team success but also places higher risk on the health and safety of your players which should always come first! Carrying 14-16 players may be a better idea.

But What About Our Dream Team?
Coaches and players alike may not be completely comfortable with the idea of changing up this team too much. But at a certain point you really need to stop trying to force something that won’t happen and consider the other side of the coin…

It’s completely normal after a particularly successful season to want to do it all over again. You figure you can toe that same line to get there again. There’s only ONE problem.  Even if you have the same coaching staff and the same roster…

This year’s team is NOT last year’s team.

I’ll say it again… this. year’s. team…  is. NOT. last. year’s. team

1) Even if you had the EXACT same roster as “last year” it doesn’t mean you have the “same” team. It does NOT guarantee you the same results…especially if you’re moving up a division. The players on the team are a year older. They have another year of life experience under their belts. They have another year of softball experience under their belts. They have different things going on in school this year. Some have different friends. Some are more mature and more focused. Others are more distracted. All of these changes in the lives of the players change WHO they are this year compared to a year ago. That’s true for each and every one of them. That changes the team dynamic!

2) The idea that you will be able to do the “same thing” with the “same team” and get the “same result” is delusional. You already saw in #1 how this is NOT the “same” team so as last year, so right off the bat the idea that you’re doing the same thing with the “same team” is erroneous.  Now let’s address doing the “same thing.” Let’s say you ran some new drills last year or incorporated new practice strategies that the girls really responded to or did some new workout/training program last year. Well, if you do that again this year, will it still be “new” to the girls? No because they already did it last year. It’s not going to have the EXACT same effect so it will not give you the EXACT same result. That’s what makes coaching fun…if each season was exactly the same if you ran the “same” drills with the “same” girls, softball would be awfully boring.

So if you feel like having the “same” team will guarantee success THIS season, you’re fooling yourself. Not only is your team NOT the “same” neither is your competition! The one thing you can count on in this world is that things WILL change. Having the “same” team may actually lull you into a false sense of security. Coaches, players, and parents all know success is possible. It’s already happened and sometimes an entire team environment and organization falls into the trap of expecting it to just happen again without pouring in the same “dirty work” and burning motivation.

3) Embrance the change.  As the title to this article states…the ONE constant you can count on is that things will change.  This is true in softball and in life.  Change in a team is an opportunity to learn to adapt and grow in spite of the changes in environment.  In real life, if you don’t keep up, you will get left behind.  In higher levels of softball, team personnel changes.  Starting lineups change.  Coaching staffs change.  Training environments change, etc, etc, etc.

If you shelter players from this aspect of the game and of life, they may not know how to deal with it when they get older and when the stakes are greater.

So if you can keep a team together, that’s cool.  But if a little change or a lot of change happens, stop beating your head up against a wall trying to stop it.  Stop wasting time and energy putting off the inevitable and wishing for something that’s just not going to happen.  Embrace the opportunity to grow even more, to develop more than just softball skills.  Yes, change is uncomfortable and there are some things about the new situation that may not be as good as what used to be.  BUT all new situations open up opportunities that would have never been avialable otherwise. Focus on that!

What?  You’re probably wondering what the heck I’m talking about.  What’s an 11% hole and what does it have to do with vision and softball?

Listen to this softball audio on vision and why it’s so key, then you’ll understand…

So what do you think?

Did this vision clip make you go, “Hmmm…?”

Do you see why vision is so key in daily motivation and in softball success?

Have you ever put yourself in an 11% hole?

Will you ever do it again?

Do you even have a vision for softball? Or is it time to get started on one?

What did you think about the thoughts I shared on vision? Do you agree? Have you even thought about this concept before?

Leave me a comment and let me know what you think…

Sound familiar?

It’s one thing to expect success or desired results while diligently working toward them.  It’s another to expect it will magically happen without having to actually do anything or put any effort toward those goals.

One describes DRIVEN, the other describes SPOILED.  Which one are you?

Are you sure about that?

It’s funny how I’ve complained about this millennial generation acting spoiled and yet, after taking a really good hard look at myself in the mirror, I realized that I’ve acted the exact same way in some areas of my life.

Today’s society is soooo heavy on instant gratification.  Technology gives us a variety of ways to get answers NOW, to get information NOW, to get in touch with friends and family NOW, to get what we want when we want it, which most times is NOW.  We sit on our butts, press a few buttons, and voila!  The world is delivered to us.

Backwards Thinking
Credit, which most “average” American families are familiar with, allow us to get things NOW and pay later.  No longer do we value the concept of working hard first, save with discipline, then pay with cash AFTER we EARN it.

Why go through all that trouble when retailers are offering “6 months same as cash?”  We can take it home NOW then simply earn and pay for it later.   Even though this is ridiculously backwards and typically doesn’t work well in any scenario, we get caught up in this way of thinking.

Whether we realize it or not, our brain is bombarded with the idea that we don’t need to first EARN the things we want/get.  We can “magically” get them NOW then figure out the rest later.  Bad plan.

Living for Today
But I’m “Living for Today!” That’s all fine and dandy if it motivates you to throw your BEST into everything you do.  It’s not so great when you use it as a justification to do stupid, irresponsible things now because there may be no “tomorrow” in which to do and/or pay for it.

Do What I Say
Do what I say, not what I do.  I’m sure you’ve heard that one before.  Unfortunately for us, that’s not the way it works.

After having some sense knocked back into me by life, I realized that maybe a big reason kids act entitled is because ADULTS in their life are modeling it for them in the choices and decisions that they make.  Remember, they are more likely to do what we do, rather than do what we say.

That’s right, I said it.  The adults, that’s us, in their life are modeling it for them.  Now, it’s very possible you may not be, but I’m sure that if you think hard enough, you can think of someone in their lives who is.  Or, you may be able to think of one area in your life or your coaching where you are acting like a spoiled little kid.

But I Deserve It
Some people feel that they work hard, they “deserve” a “treat” (nice expensive car or dinner or vacation) whether or not they can actually afford it.  This is not a mature decision. I don’t care if it’s a good idea or not, I “deserve” it! This is not a good reason to make a bad choice.  I’m not saying you don’t deserve a treat.  I’m just saying that maybe you need to choose a different treat.

Short Term Sacrifice, Long Term Gain
Maybe you’ve seen coaches short on time in the pre-season skip the basics and move on to more advanced stuff because they want to be “ready.”  Have you ever done that?

How about this one…

It’s not fair to the rest of the team to forfeit the game because some players broke a team rule.

We find so many ways to justify or rationalize these choices that really aren’t all that wise.

It’s not easy make tough decisions today for bigger payoffs in the long run.  Can you make that call to sacrifice that ONE game now to nip a potentially huge problem in the bud?

It’s so tempting to take the easy route today even if it’s not the best long term decision.  It’s natural to gravitate toward the path of least resistance.

When a toddler screams at the top of their lungs, throws a full tantrum on the floor, and shows no sign of ever giving up, it’s awfully tempting to just give ‘em what they want to placate them and get ‘em to shut up!  But you and I both know that’s not a good idea.

While that easy route is less painful or uncomfortable now, but it can cause ongoing pain/stress and greater disappointment/grief later.

When you have the strength to make the necessary sacrifices now, to do the necessary “dirty work” now, to make the tough choices now, the payoff in the long run will be more than worth it.

The problem is that sometimes we adults, not just “kids nowdays,” have the tendency to make decisions based upon now (let’s shut that screaming toddler up as quick as possible) instead of thinking and looking long term at the “big picture.”

We take the easy way out now and decide to worry about the consequences later and hope that somehow by that time, the problem is magically fixed.  We choose not to do the necessary “dirty work” now so that we can have the desirable results we want long term.  Bad plan! And guess what?

That shows through in our players and in their choice to take the easy way out of the “dirty work” now and worry about the consequences of that later while hoping all along that somehow they will magically still get the result they want later.

Not gonna happen!

Have the discipline and the diligence and the maturity to do what it takes, no matter how tough it may be now, to move toward the desired, “big picture” results later.  Keep that big picture and long term mindset on hand and it will make so called “tough” decisions much simpler. Plus you will be living and breathing the qualities, principles, and values you want to develop in your team.

Well, sometimes players need it in softball too!

Have you ever run across a player that wants to be too perfect?  Perfectionism in athletes can actually be detrimental because athletes that are perfectionist often:

• are afraid to make mistakes
• get upset over the littlest mistake
• are often disappointed frustrated with their performance because it never measures up to perfection
• are reasonably critical of themselves
• expect too much of themselves

All of these things can put a dent in a your confidence. If you try to play this game without confidence, you’ll probably fail much more than you should and, on top of that, won’t find the game very enjoyable. Obviously if you get to that point, you’re in trouble!  Once this game is “no fun” its either time for serious changes or time to give it up.

SO – since you probably don’t want to get to that point, here’s a little trick Dr. Patrick Cohn, youth sports psychology expert, uses to help players who are perfectionists.

He suggests giving them 3 “Get Out of Jail Free” cards at the beginning of a game or practice.  If your player/child makes a mistake, they (mentally) use one of the cards to let go of the mistake and move on.  Being able to let a mistake go and keep moving forward is such a critical part of becoming the best softball player you can be.  Not only that, this is yet another skill that applies to all areas of life, not just to playing softball on the field.

What do you think?  Is this something you would try?  Do you think this can help you?

But after months and month of coming out day after day, it’s not always easy to stay motivated and focused. It can be quite simple to start “going through the motions” and “check-out” mentally as you take your zillionth swing or throw of the season.

BUT - if you want to be the best you can be in this season, if you want to finish stronger than you started, (which is the point right), you really need to make a commitment to what you are doing. You need to make a commitment to put yourself “all-in” and push all the way through to the end and beyond – similarly to what I talked about in this baserunning post.

That’s why I think it’s so critical to be able to create a habit, the sooner the better, of doing the little things to perfection. Sometimes the long road ahead, or the long road that has already passed, make the entire journey too daunting to look at. It makes this ONE drill seem insignificant. In times like those, if you can simply go back to your simple habit of investing in each drill, in each rep – put your whole self in in each little segment of your training – just commit to that one moment, that one rep at a time…it can help you keep moving forward when the day-to-day starts to feel mundane. It can help keep you on track while to take a moment to rejuvenate and get the fire burning again.

If you can’t do that, if you don’t know how to keep doing at least those “little things” right, then that one “insignificant” drill or rep turns into two, or three. or simply turns into an entire day (what’s ONE practice right?). Then next thing you know, another day is “insignificant” and another and another until you’ve spent in entire week being sub-par, training at a level you’d never actually want to perform at and what good did you do yourself? Probably none at all, and in fact, you may have actually “hurt” yourself creating bad habits physically and/or mentally.

When it comes to staying “on track,” it’s also extremely important to set out with some “bigger” purpose. Something far more important to you than just one drill. Something that you are working toward and working for. Something that makes each drill and each rep and each day on the field worth it. If you’re lucky – just being there is reward enough. For some, that’s the way it is. The opportunity to go out there and do softball stuff is the highlight of any given day. For those people, motivation and focus is rarely a major issue.

But even the best, even the most determined sometimes get into those “moods” when they simply don’t feel like 100%. You know what? That’s human. It’s OKAY. Give yourself a break every now and then. Understand that it’s part of being an athlete. It’s something everyone goes through. Don’t waste time worrying about it. Acknowledge it, address it, and do what you need to do to refresh. You need it. It’s almost impossible to stay at full intensity ALL the time. You need to find ways to unwind, to relax, to refresh, and to rejuvenate mind, body, and spirit in order to perform the best you can.

Finishing up a season strong, isn’t easy. That’s why only a few an do it and do it well. It’s easy at the beginning. It’s easy as you start getting to the “meat” of your season. But when all that’s done and you’ve been climbing and climbing all year long…now there are two directions you can go. You can keep pushing and continue reaching higher and higher – usually this is the tougher, more challenging road. OR you can let up, stop pushing, and find yourself sliding,. or maybe even rolling, down the hill or mountain you just climbed.

Which is it going to be? Can you stay focused? Can you re-commit? Can you, for just a fraction of the time you’ve already put in…keep moving forward and finish stronger than you started? Take it one step at a time…you can do it!

Actually, not much. I was just thinking of a common phrase you hear at fast food restaurants where you can “have it your way.” One thing they always ask you is, “Would you like fries with that?” Some softball players seem to carry the “have it your way” mentality onto the softball field. I mean, believe me, I think it’s great that all I have to do is ask and I’ll get a chicken sandwich with no lettuce, but athletics doesn’t always allow you to have things your way. Too many softball players want things “their way” in order to perform at their best. Guess how often they’re going to do well.

Not very often.

Yes, bad weather may make the game more challenging. Yes, bad calls can be frustrating. Yes, having your great hits caught all day long can be discouraging. BUT if you always let these outside circumstances dictate your confidence and how you feel, chances are you’re never going to be in the optimal mindset for maximum performance.

I mean seriously, you’ve trained for too long to let ANYTHING take that away from you, much less something you have no control over. Whether this is only your first season and you’ve only been training for a few weeks or whether you’re an experienced player and you’ve been training for years – trust all that hard work you’ve already done. Don’t let one or two things on game day override all that effort you’ve already invested in yourself and make you feel like you can’t be successful.

It’s true the situation around you or your environment may not be what you want. Maybe the field you play on isn’t the best, or your team isn’t the best, or your equipment isn’t the best, BUT there will always be something and you can’t let that stop you from being your best.

You have full control over what you think and the mindset you having going into competition. Don’t leave it to chance. Stop allowing yourself to use excuses for poor performance. The more you blame other things, the less you’ll be able to make the real adjustments you need to help you get better as a player.

If you’re waiting for everything to be perfect before you can perform your best, it may never happen. Yes, it might be easier if you had the best of everything around you – better teammates, better coaches, better field conditions, better equipment, better umpires, etc, etc, etc but if you keep looking to everything around you to get better or keep looking to what you don’t have as the reason you’re not successful, where do you draw the line? When does it stop? Really, if you’re going to wait for all that to be just right, what else are you going to want? Would you like the sun to be at a certain angle perhaps? How about we wait for the wind to blow one direction while you’re up to bat and the other when your opponent is up to bat? Planetary alignment maybe?

Do you want fries with that?

You get the idea. When does it end? If you keep looking for excuses, you’re never going to reach your full potential. At some point you have to put all the outside BullSh*t aside and take responsibility for your own performance! Too much focus on everything else that could be different doesn’t help YOU get better. Make adjustments where you can – with YOURSELF and stop focusing so much on things you have no control over.

But if you want to know one of the BEST ways to get your point across to your coach…keep reading…

Talk is cheap…

Actions speak louder than words…

If you want to send your coach a message, do it with your PERFORMANCE!

Your performance in practice, your performance in pre-game, your performance in game situations is much more likely to make an impression on your coach than anything you (or your parents) could say.  Make sure that the message you send with your performance is a consistently positive one and you’ll have a much better chance at getting the playing time you want.

Often time confidence is what separates good players from great players.  Confidence can be the difference between a successful at bat and a strike out.  So when you need to boost your confidence before a game or between innings, give this exercise a try.

It’s one that Dr. Hanson’s used time and time again with great success.  (and remember, he works with professional athletes as well – if it works for them, it can work for you too).

Watch the Free Video Now

Skip the arguments and trash talking and drama. It will always be around you.  Don’t get caught up in it.  If you really want to excel and reach your goals, you have no time for it.  Let them talk.  In the mean time you’ll be busy working on your game and getting better.  Then, when it comes down to it, when it really counts, guess who’ll be the one to actually get the job done?  Actually accomplishing the goals that they set?

Guess who will be the one that stands head and shoulders above the rest?

Them – with all the time they spent talking?

Or you – the one reaping the rewards of all the time you spent working?

Keep your mouth shut, your nose to the grindstone…keep doing what you LOVE, place your energy and effort in the right places, and let your results speak for themselves.

The only way to start making headway and get results sooner rather than later is to get focused!

So, my question to you is: What BIG problem will you tackle this week?

Notice the word problem is singular.  Just think of ONE thing, ONE issue that you need to and can take care of this week.  Think of one change that can make a big positive impact on your current situation.

Now, it doesn’t only have to be softball related.  Why?  Because I’ve found, that there are times when issues “off the field” affect our performance on the field.  As much as we try to keep those things separate, there are times when it’s very difficult to help.  Those “off field” issues can be as much of a distraction or challenge as your opponent in a game.  Sometimes you have to take care of a bothersome or pressing issue off the field so that you can focus better and perform with less worry and anxiety on the field.

So, what is the ONE big problem you are going to tackle this week (before next Focus Friday comes around)?

Leave a comment below and share the one obstacle/challenge/issue you WILL overcome in the next 7 days.

Focusing too much on your weaknesses can leave you with a sense of incompetancy. You may begin to doubt your ability, maybe even your value, as a player.  This, in turn, can lead to lack of confidence and I’m sure you know what happens when your confidence level drops…so does your level of performance!

So again, while it’s great to identify and work on your weaknesses, it’s also very important to remember your strengths, what you’re good at, and what you CAN do.   Even the best in the world, whether it’s in sports, or business, or in any other area, has weaknesses.  However, these people are VERY good at accentuating their strengths and making sure they are the best at what they do well – so much so that their weaknesses are often overlooked because they are so far overpowered by their strengths.  Focus less on what you can’t do and focus a little more on what you CAN do.

For today’s Focus Friday, I want you to list 5 things you’re good at or do well.

Here are mine:

1. Enjoying the game of softball
2. Sharing what I know with others
3. Encouraging others
4. Moving past mistakes and learning from them
5. Making Strawberry Banana Smoothies

What’s your 5?  Leave a comment below and share them!

P.S. – Tom Hanson talks about Focus in his 7 Success Secrets for Baseball/Softball CD. If you haven’t picked up your complimentary copy yet (just pay $4.95 shipping), get it HERE.

photo credit: http://www.flickr.com/photos/wadem/ / CC BY-SA 2.0

What I didn’t know was that, at the very beginning of her college career, this player started off as a pinch runner. That’s all she was doing.

Her mom remembers talking with her after the first few games of that freshman season. She’d call and ask how the games went and if she got to play. Her daughter would say that “all she did” was pinch run. After a few games, the softball mom could hear the increasing frustration and irritation in her daughter’s voice. One day, when her daughter told her that all she did was pinch run, she responded with,

“Well then you better be the best pinch runner your team has ever seen.”

Her daughter later told her that that had been a wake up call for her. It was a turning point in her college career. After that phone call, she made a decision to stop grumbling, work her butt off, and take advantage of every opportunity she did get.

Most softball players, whether they are conscious of it or not, make this same kind of choice every single day. As a player, you can choose to be frustrated and irritated and grumble about your situation; or you can choose to stay away from that negative mindset, work your butt off, stay focused on improving, and take advantage of whatever opportunities come your way. These opportunities do not only come in games. They come in practice as well.

I’ve also heard players grumble about not having as many chances as other players do, and while that may very well be the case, they are more productive ways to spend your time and energy. Instead of focusing on what you don’t have, it serves you better to stay positive and make it a point to make the best of any opportunity you do get.  Stop focusing on what you don’t have and start fully appreciating and making the most of what you do have. You’re much more likely to be successful that way.

So how did this player I mentioned earlier go from being “just a pinch runner” to being Conference Freshman of the Year?

Well, one day a player on her team was having a rough day. The coach decided to put her in the game to replace that player.  She had a great day and that was it.  She never looked back.  She became a regular starter and ended up as the Freshman Player of the Year in her conference.  It’s a great example of how having the right mindset and attitude as a player can propel you to great things.

As a parent, are you cultivating the right mindset?  Or do you add to and feed the negativity your daughter sometimes falls into?
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I receive messages all the time regarding unfair or undesirable circumstances.

“My daughter’s coach doesn’t give her enough chances.”

“The umpires are so unfair.”

“I might quit softball because of my coach”

…etc, etc, etc.

Everyone has the same question…”What should I do?”

The long and short of my answer: Keep playing YOUR game!

Let’s face it, there are challenges and obstacles all around us. Not only in softball, but in life and business too. I’m not saying you shouldn’t try to do anything about the undesirable or unfair circumstances around you, but the fact is, you can only do so much.

There will always be something in your environment or in your situation that is less than ideal. Take those situations as a opportunity to learn to succeed and perform at your best in spite of those obstacles and challenges. Take the focus off your negative surroundings and get focused on the things you can do and can control.

It is not the first and will not the last time you’ll be in a challenging situation whether it’s on or off the field.  But each time you are faced with a tough situation, use it as an opportunity to get better at attaining your goals and achieving what you want no matter what’s going on around you.

I know it’s a lot easier said than done, but that’s why you need to take advantage of every opportunity you get to get better at it.  I’m not saying you should never feel frustrated or feel upset because something is unfair.  Those feelings are normal.  It’s human to feel those emotions. However, how you react to the situationa and what you do from there is more important.

Do your best to eliminate negativity and get more focused on DOING what you came to do. Play ball and play well!

Congratulations Roosevelt!

In addition to all the hard work Roosevelt did, I think their success is also attributed to their approach. There was something Coach Clay said in the newspaper article about their championship win that caught my eye.  It was a topic I had wanted to talk about, but didn’t really know how to go about it or explain it well.  Hopefully by referencing this article, it will help, so I’m going to try.

In the article, Coach Clay said, “To be honest, we didn’t really think about (an approach to Mililani’s lineup),” Roosevelt coach Clay Okamura said. “Mililani is a mean team, take nothing away from them. But we didn’t think about (them), we were more concerned about what we had to do.” That’s a big part of why they won.

Too often we focus on our opponent. The pitcher has a great change up.  Their batters can hit the ball.  They’re great at putting down the bunt.  They’re aggressive on the bases.  Watch for the rise ball…etc, etc, etc.  Not that it’s wrong to know your opponent, but I think it’s a mistake for them to be your primary focus.

What about YOU and what you CAN do? When you go into a game thinking primarily of all these things your opponent CAN do what happens when you start to see it in the game.  You see that great change up the pitcher has working.  You see them being aggressive on the base paths.  You see them getting great hits.  All they need to do is show any of those things a few times and you start thinking, “Oh man, there’s that change up of hers” or “Gosh, they really are fast on the bases” or “Yup, they sure can hit the ball a ton.”  What does that do for your confidence or your view of the game?  It only affirms your “beliefs” in what the other team CAN do, probably starts to discourage you or at least plants seeds of doubt about your team’s chance at success, and only makes the other team more of a formidable opponent.

And since you’ve been so focused on them, when your team gets a great hit here or there or your pitcher makes some great pitches or when your team makes a great defensive play, you almost don’t even “see” it because you’re too busy seeing all the great things the other team can do.

But what if you hadn’t been so focused on your opponent.  Yes, be aware of the threats they may throw and you and be ready for them, but focus on your team, what you CAN do and what YOUR STRENGTHS are. Then when your team gets a good hit or two, you think, “See, we CAN hit this pitcher” – it builds on your confidence to be successful in the game even more.  When you focus on knowing that your defense is strong and can make plays and then you see it start (just start) to happen in the game, again, it only builds your confidence and re-affirms your belief in your team’s ability to get the job done on defense.  And while all this is going on, since you haven’t put much focus on the other team, you probably aren’t thinking so much about the things they are doing in the game.  Yes, they may get a hit here or there or they may make a great play on defense or their pitcher may make great pitches throughout the game, but if you’re focused on your team and what you CAN and ARE doing, I think you’re a whole lot more likely to be successful and play closer to your full potential.

PERFORMANCE = POTENTIAL – INTERFERENCE

Dr. Tom Hanson talks about performance in terms of the formula PERFORMANCE = POTENTIAL – INTERFERENCE.  I think focus on the other team strengths is interference that takes away from your potential and lessens your performance.

I mean, let’s get real here for a minute.  If you’re playing a tough team they ARE going to hit the ball, they ARE going to make good defensive plays, their pitcher probably WILL get some of your batters.  It’s all a part of what makes them a worthy opponent. If you’re going to allow those things to discourage you, then you’re probably going to get discouraged real quick because those things WILL happen in the game.  Focus less on them and more on you because your performance is the only one you can do anything about.